Abuela con Checkers

Good evening faithful readers...I just have to share this with you.

Have you ever had an experience so surreal that you wonder if it is really happening or not? Today I had one such experience. I was in Cracker Barrel and had just finished eating a delightful and healthy Smokehouse Breakfast. I had the scrambled eggs, grits, and link sausage. It was delicious with just a pinch of pepper. Of course Diet Coke to wash it all down. This has nothing to do with the story, but I just wanted to share (and perhaps make you hungry for breakfast...)

Anyway, I finished my meal and went out into the country garage sale that they call a "General Store". I was looking through a spinner rack at a bunch of old TV show DVDs when it happened. A shadow loomed over me as I was bent down looking over a "Night Court" compilation. I looked up to see a nice smiling woman...probably a grandmother...looking down on me. She held that pose for a couple of minutes and then raised her right hand. Gripped tightly in her palm was a red disc. At first, I had no idea what it was...but when I stood up...I could see that it was a piece of one of those rug-sized checker boards.

Then the surreality started. In Spanish, abuela began shouting at me and pointing at the checker board. Then she would point at me...then again at the checker board. Now I don't speak Spanish, but I could kinda figure out that she was throwing down the gauntlet. She was challenging me to a game of checkers. Right there in the middle of Cracker Barrel. She had already set up the board and everything. And she wasn't quiet about it, either. It was like a weird version of those pre-WWE wrestling matches where the combatants taunt each other and make idol threats. Only in this case...one combatant was full of grits and Diet Coke and the other has 75 photos of grandchildren in her purse.

What did I do? Did I dive in and mop up the floor with this sweet Spanish Grandmother? Did I ignore her and grab a handful of tea light candles from the Yankee candle display? Where was Mindy during all this? Why am I writing this to you?

Honestly, I don't remember what happened next. I do know that I kinda snuck away...paid my bill...and left with my little bag of Andes mints to freshen my breakfast breath. Abuela was left in the wake of my memory. A challenge that was left unmet...a date with destiny unfulfilled...

Will this score ever be settled? Will there ever be one table game champion to rule them all? Time will tell. Until then...be sure to order a large OJ with breakfast...Diet Coke makes you jumpy.

BV